Hi, we’re the Bastard Brothers and we’re here to terrorise you innocent Bands and Musicians out there.

First, make sure you know what you want to get out of  sending in a demo.  Think this through carefully.  It might seem like an obvious suggestion, but we often get confused as to what bands want from us apart from £1,000,000.

For example, if what you are really looking for is someone to say "you’re gggggggggreat" you should send your stuff to your mates.  They make a much more appreciative audience.

To give you another example… people often present material to us and only ask us for the advice we can give. Whilst this may is flattering and understandable, this should not be the reason you go to the trouble of sending stuff out.  (Anyway, you are already getting our best advice here).

 

When choosing which tracks to send, chose the ones that you are into the most.  It’s also worth trying to make sure that they are representative of the rest of your material. Recently a band we liked sounded really promising on a promotional CD compilation, but when we heard the rest of the stuff… You guessed it… It was completely, I mean TOTALLY different!

 

Please send only 3 tracks. Strangely we find this is the most frequently ignored tip, yet one of the easiest to follow. Maybe send 4 tracks if they are very short, but stick to 3 if possible. We can always ask you for more material if we wish. OK, send us your CD album if you must. You are going to anyway.

 

Yes,… these are real Artists that have recently sent packages to us. What do you think they might sound like? Do you think you might be into their stuff on the strength of their name? Would you now go out of the way to hear them? OK, so now you would.

 

Consider you logo. It could also be giving out the wrong impression. Test it out with others to get their reaction. It may be totally different to what you expect. Perhaps compare your logo against the others. You want us to get the right idea of what your band or music is about don’t you?

 

Include a photo. When you meet someone in the street or down the pub they get a chance to look into your face. So don’t be shy. We need to 'cop an eyeful' of you at some point. Actually, it’s useful to be able to recognise you so that we hand your royalty cheque to the right person.

Perhaps also think through your photo and the image of your band in general. Again, it might not be giving out the right message to others. As with your logo, why not get your friend’s reaction to it. Remember, when you present a photo to us, you are not just showing us how you see yourself, you are also showing us how you want others to see you. If your thing is Heavy Metal Cock Rock then you’re a loser if you look like ABBA. OK, so The Darkness have now proved me wrong on this point.

 

Do some research on us. A few minutes spent browsing our pages will show you that we DO NOT deal in Folk Music, Hip-Hop, Classical, Rap, American Country, Cover Bands, Singer Songwriters, World Music, Commercial Chart Entry Pop Music, Funk, R'n'B, Instrumental Music or Love Songs. We DO NOT have opportunities for session musicians and we DO NOT need 1 song offers from songwriters. Listen to our audio files - maybe even mail-order a CD, but try to get a feel for what we do and if we might suit you.

 

Remember to put your name, address and phone number clearly on your CD or tape as well as on the letter and biog that you send with it. You see, things can… therefore do… get separated. It's 'sod's law'. Would you believe… we actually have demo's we would like to follow up but can't…, because we don't know who sent them!!

By the way, if you leave your address and/or email off we will not respond. We find that being able to reject people in writing makes our job a lot more pleasant. Having to make a call to reject someone because we only have their phone number is a total pain in the arse.

 

DO NOT send packages to us by registered post or recorded delivery that we have to sign for. This is a total wind-up. We always miss the first delivery at 8.30am and are forced to go to the sorting office with proof of id. All we get rewarded with is a couple of packages that when opened smell of stale cigarette smoke and beer. It is even more disappointing when we find both of them contain CD-Rs with the next ‘Save The World’ sung by one person with an acoustic guitar. This is totally inappropriate for us! But, you know the weirdest thing?  It's that all the packages sent on a proof of deliver service contain a CD-R with the next ‘Save The World’! We reckon that it’s the same person sending these packages. Believe me, only the crappest stuff seems to be sent ‘to be signed for’.

If you want some security that your package arrived, put your return address on the outside. It's cheaper. And, if Postman Pat can't deliver it, you get your stuff back J.

 

Be polite. It is not a crime or a punishable offence for anyone to reject your stuff. It is our choice and our right to have an opinion. We are not under obligation to sign anyone, or even to tell you why we have decided to say no. There are many extremely good reasons for having to reject someone, even if we love the material.

*Please note, we DO NOT normally return any material submitted to us.  Should you want us to return your demo, you must enclose a postage paid self addressed envelope*

 

Despite what you may believe, we DO NOT care if your demo is recorded in the best studio or on the magnetic strip of a credit card (mind you, we can’t play one of those). We DO NOT care if your CV is in colour, B&W or if your photo is from a disposable camera. We only consider if it 'works'.

In Soho we are constantly confronted by some of the very best imagery and art & design. As a Record Label we get presented with new stuff from many top Artists that is recorded in the best studios. Believe me when I say we have been there, done that and bought the T-shirt. So don't try to compete. Instead, try to demonstrate your talent, confidence, vision, personality, charisma and all that other stuff that’s hard to put your finger on. If you find it difficult to sort out your logo and artwork then leave those bits, and simply rely on your music to get the message across. You are asking us to consider whether we feel able to work with you for some time to come. You are not actually trying to prove how much you spent on your tape, or how perfectly recorded the keyboard is, or how little hiss you're getting from your £10,000 eight track sound card.

 

It’s your shout …

Let us know what you hope to have happen as a result of sending your tapes out or what frustrates you the most about presenting your stuff to the music industry.  We would be fascinated to hear from you.  Drop a note to us. The details are on on our about page.